Thanks for your help and I am signing off

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Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby JustGettingBy » Thu Aug 25, 2016 8:19 am

I was a very active member of this web site for years (more than 1,600 posts). I came here looking for help in my marriage that I was generally unhappy with. I appreciate this site and some of the people on it that helped me get to a more emotionally healthy spot. In the end (and with the help of a therapist) I came to realize that my wife was ignoring our marriage. She still to this day is and the last 2 years or so I have just been focusing on getting myself emotionally healthy.

I have been active all my life and held almost all the top male callings at the ward level and many in the stake level. I am the guy that has signed up for almost all the service projects.

But this is more of my sign off from this site. After 4 years of gut-wrenching studying, pondering, and praying (and yes- doubting my doubts) I can no longer consider myself a believer. I have worked through the anger stage and I am committed to not being and angry ex-Mormon. I can see where the church works really good for some and they can't see why someone would leave. I would encourage if it is working for you - keep at it. The church does some things really well.

I still choose to believe in God and I am not breaking any big commandments nor do I feel any desire to do so. In fact I feel more urgently to help those that are downtrodden and need real help and plan on taking much of the time I used to spend. I am less worried about my place in the hereafter and more concerned about helping people right now.

I will check back for a few days if there are any questions (I am NOT trolling to make others loose their faith). But some may have questions how issues I had on this site intertwined with my loss of belief.

I wish each of you on this site - even all the lurkers that never post - the best of luck in your relationships. The only overall advice I would give is to actively work on your relationship issues and don't ignore them and hope the issues go away.
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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby cmptrwiz » Thu Aug 25, 2016 9:07 am

Sorry to see you go. Your input has been welcomed. Please reconsider leaving?


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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby MrShorty » Thu Aug 25, 2016 10:12 am

Best of luck to you, JGB. I have enjoyed and learned from your contributions to this site over the years. I hope you find a spiritual path that works for you, that keeps you close to God and Christ.
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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby One Step » Thu Aug 25, 2016 11:00 am

I wish you the best. We all have our own journey and am happy to hear that yours involves helping others along their journey. If that's not Christ-like, I don't know what is.
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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby Momgyver » Thu Aug 25, 2016 11:02 pm

Best of luck in your journey. I hope you find the peace and happiness you deserve... and you DO deserve peace and happiness. I will miss your perspective here. I think you should still drop in and post sometimes.
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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby KSSunflower » Fri Aug 26, 2016 3:06 pm

Sad to see you go. I hope you will let us know how you are doing from time to time.
"It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover." ― Marge Piercy, “Sensuality is not a sexual invitation, it’s a depth invitation.” ― Lebo Grand http://mormonsexualdialogue.boards.net/, http://www.chatzy.com/24691190515294
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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby ILMW » Fri Aug 26, 2016 4:35 pm

Thanks, JGB, for your honest, straightforward posts. I really hope you consider posting here from time to time, as I for one have benefited from your contributions. The fact that you are changing your relationship with the church doesn't mean that you and us can't continue to benefit from your participation! Either way, I wish you the best.
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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby greywolfe13 » Fri Aug 26, 2016 11:19 pm

Sorry to see anyone leave, but your posts have been good for me so even more hate to hear you may be leaving. You understand the culture and I'm sure if you continue to not try to influence anyone away, your perspective would not only be helpful, but welcome.

I really hope you have the best experience possible from the rest of your life.
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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby cmfray » Sat Aug 27, 2016 9:19 am

Wow - I was not expecting this JGB. How does your wife and family feel about your decision? Are you staying with your wife?
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Re: Thanks for your help and I am signing off

Postby beachdreamer » Sat Aug 27, 2016 7:02 pm

Sorry to see you go. I can related to your posts, they sound a lot like my own feelings years ago.

I would think it would be easier to justify leaving your wife than leaving the church. Or did they come together? I can see how the feelings you have could lead you to lose hope and faith in the church. I hope you will find peace where ever you go.
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