Dirty chatting online

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Re: Dirty chatting online

Postby greywolfe13 » Thu Apr 07, 2016 3:43 pm

I read an ebook a while back called Confessions of a Mormon Swinger. The couple in the book went to much effort to prevent becoming friends with any of the people they played with. I had a hard time understanding how extra marital sex was fine, but friendship with those that would participate was not. I think the key to a loving marriage is the ability to be open about anything. If a friendship is growing with someone and both know about what is going on, then the friendship shouldn't cause problems. I often wish I had a female friend that I could talk about sexual topics with so she could help me better understand what a woman feels, and especially what a woman desires. If she knew my wife, then she might be able to put into words things my wife doesn't seem to be able to. When the chatting and friendship become secretive, then I think it is emotionally the same as cheating on the spouse.

Once upon a time my dad was getting phone calls from some woman. My older sister was really upset as she knew my dad was having an affair. What my dad was doing, was working with a jeweler to get some new rings for my mother to honor one of their anniversaries. I think some are so afraid of the perceptions of others they feel a friendship that could include sexual topics in discussions must mean sexual actions are going on. Whether it is just talk about those topics, or actions, it really isn't anyone's business but the couple. I think the best way to keep that close of a friendship away from actions is for there to be openness. My dad's efforts to keep the secret until the anniversary made things seem improper, just because it was a woman helping get the rings. Even if the chats are innocent as to actions, being secretive is not a good sign. It could be a sign of emotions that can only hurt the relationship.
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Re: Dirty chatting online

Postby conflictedhusband » Sat Aug 13, 2016 3:48 pm

It is too bad you can't have sex chats online with your spouse. Oh, wait you can. All it takes is their willingness to do it and not think it is a sin. Again, "proper mormons don't do that".
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Re: Dirty chatting online

Postby ILMW » Sun Aug 14, 2016 10:27 am

I enjoy chatting about sex and masturbation, but have some strict rules. First, I never chat with members of the opposite sex. Second, I never chat real-time about sex or masturbation. Third, I never send or receive Xrated photos. Fourth, I never touch myself while chatting about sex or masturbation. Fifth, I have no interest in having a sexual experience with whom ever I am chatting with, so if the other chatter comes on to me (i.e. "I'd like to do X with you" or anything like that) I cease the chatting.

What I do enjoy chatting about is swapping ideas with other LDS married men about sex and masturbation, bouncing ideas about what I'd like to do with my wife or alone. I also enjoy learning about what others have done or what their current practices are that I may or may not want to adopt. My chatting is very similar to discussions on this site, but sometimes I like to get more specific and detailed about ideas. I for one often feel more comfortable expressing these ideas, preferences in a smaller group (i.e. with one or two others).
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Dirty chatting online

Postby KSSunflower » Sun Aug 14, 2016 7:07 pm

ILMW, I wouldn't consider that dirty chat or sex chat, unless it somehow turns you on.

Conflicted, have you given it a try? Is your dw not interested at all? Do you send her texts or messages flirting with her? Dh and I don't really sex chat much (only if he's out of town for a long length of time) but I have sent him messages of what I want to do with him, telling him if I'm horny, sometimes I send photos of what's on my mind.

Early in our marriage dh didn't understand why I wanted to get messages or a call from him during the day. In his mind, we saw each other everyday. He had nothing new to share. I liked knowing he was thinking of me and missed me. I enjoyed being a part of his day too. It was all mundane to him but I liked hearing about it. I felt more connected to him. It would be a huge turn on if he let me know when he was thinking of me sexually too.
"It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover." ― Marge Piercy, “Sensuality is not a sexual invitation, it’s a depth invitation.” ― Lebo Grand http://mormonsexualdialogue.boards.net/, http://www.chatzy.com/24691190515294
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Re: Dirty chatting online

Postby KSSunflower » Mon Jan 29, 2018 1:50 pm

Arizona wrote:
Jgtrs wrote:
Also, it can get old pretty quick. The frivolous flinging of four letter words can get tedious... unless of course you luck upon someone who can write an orgasm out of a pile of dirty laundry... then it can be rather exciting, I guess. If you are looking for one of these experiences, look for someone who writes well and can think quickly because it's all about the creative moment.



Is been awhile for me but as I remember it this is pretty much true. I mean how many times can you tell someone you want to F them until it gets boring....

I was just re-reading this thread this caught my attention. It made me think, isn’t that what we do in our marriages? How many times can you tell someone (the same person) you want to F them until it gets boring? Interesting question.
"It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover." ― Marge Piercy, “Sensuality is not a sexual invitation, it’s a depth invitation.” ― Lebo Grand http://mormonsexualdialogue.boards.net/, http://www.chatzy.com/24691190515294
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Re: Dirty chatting online

Postby Scsurfer » Thu Feb 01, 2018 12:52 pm

You have to mentally stay in the game, keep creating a fantasy in your mind....OR it will ALL become boring and you will die sexually !!!
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